You do not need specific and/or graphic details to support a survivor. It is, in fact, extremely harmful to the survivor and could even indicate something very toxic about you. Some professionals refer to it as “verbal porn”.
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Truth and Advocacy
As good, ethical advocates, we must ALWAYS stick to the truth, and we must encourage our clients to stick to the truth. It’s OK, if a client does not remember something specific, for them to simply say, “I do not remember.”
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Ripple Effects
Don’t ever, ever think that abusers harm just one person at a time.
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Learning to Care
If we wish to help offenders, we MUST offer them only quality, best practice information and resources.
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The Importance of Education
In this day and age, there is no excuse for this level of ignorance.
Watch your tongue and mind your typing or texting fingers.
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Don’t Move the Children
Don’t fall prey to people who assume that children will be better off shipped out of the home. Even if a parent is abusive, that parent needs to be the one who goes, not the child.
We are well aware that we are likely to have those in attendance who are survivors of sexual abuse and assault.
Because of that, we always try to make even our general public events be survivor friendly in a variety of ways.
As advocates, it’s important that we direct those seeking help to the actual laws of their state, while encouraging everyone to be a moral reporter.
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Keep Your Hands to Yourself
We don’t own others, and we sure don’t own the right to their sexuality and bodies. Show respect.